My Downtown

going downtown for me is therapy.
downtown dallas and i go way back..like 16 years old Tefy back.
the only reason i even got my butt over there was because of mrs.mokuria.
internship. since then, its become so familiar. I know it better on foot then
by car. there's nothing better (other than GOD and JOLENE) than that. Its
soemthing i like doing while I am alone. I like when I go and walk around with
my iPod blasting away. I see how easily it could turn someone off from even enjoying
being there. I hated downtown. It smelt and there was trash and men hit on you. But
there came a time that I went there every morning...and every afternoon. I would see the same
hot dog vendor. I would know if I was late or not just by simply seeing the people. No longer did it smell or make me groan. I took it as a calm place. really ironic considering the ruckus the people, buses, cars, and trains create but it just became me and downtown. It was my therapy in teh sense that it was where my moments of silence came face to face with the realities of whatever was going on. I would think and realize the error of my ways and just be understand everything. I've endured the summer downtown and the rainy April downtown. the hot rays burning you through your shirt and you forehead starting to sweat. the water starting off with small drizzle...only to grow..grow...grow and before you know it..You're soaking wet from your head to your toes...literally. Your socks squish squash as you walk. I've cried silently inside realizing the stupid choices and have faced the truth of that one person not being who they say they are. I've imagined my life in a complete new way...dreamt about my future home, future car, future job, future life.....moslty....love.

I want to love now and be open with love...but is love ready for me? Perhaps not. I'm wanting love but not ready either. I just want it to feel it but is all of me ready? I love Jolene. That makes sense.

My downtown. A place of refuge among people of hustle and bustle. Tranquility in the eye of a hurricane. A place I call sanity.

-TEFY